Anne Robinson Is The Weakest Link In Her Own Marriage

Anne Robinson has gained incredible fame as either the fierce ice-maiden presenter of The Weakest Link or the barmy-eyed jolly PE teacher presenter of Test The Nation, and they're both equally attractive to all men.

And now all the men in the world have a chance with Anne Robinson, because she's getting divorced from her husband after 27 years of marriage. Apparently the divorce between Anne Robinson and John Penrose is completely amicable with no other people involved, which makes us wonder why they're even bothering getting a divorce anyway. However, we think we have an idea - Anne Robinson was married to John Penrose for 27 years and, by our estimations, that's at least 9,855 times that Anne Robinson said goodnight to John Penrose with a creepy, slow, skin-crawling wink. And that's at least 9,853 times more than most people would be able to take without hurling themselves out of the window in blind panic.

It's never easy on a marriage when the wife suddenly becomes more famous than the husband. Jessica Simpson split up with Nick Lachey because of this, thanks to Lachey's uncanny ability to be more anonymous than some wood. Renee Zellweger and Kenny Chesney annulled their marriage because of this, because only a handful of toothless rednecks actually know who Kenny Chesney is, and Paul McCartney and Heather Mills divorced because of this when the world realised that a one-legged woman pointing at some pigs is better than The Beatles.

And it looks like this may be he reason why the 27-year marriage between The Weakest Link host Anne Robinson and her husband John Penrose has come to an end. When they first got married Anne Robinson was just the assistant editor of the Daily Mirror, but over the years Anne Robinson's career has grown and grown; first she was the host of Points Of View, then the host of Watchdog and then the globe-straddling host of The Weakest Link, a job that's helped her accumulate a £60 million fortune and become a figurehead for mean-spirited ginger people everywhere. Anyway, Anne Robinson's new life as a sort of winking dominatrix has inevitably meant that she's drifted apart from John Penrose and now they're getting a divorce. Reuters reports:

"Weakest Link" presenter Anne Robinson is divorcing her husband John Penrose after 27 years of marriage. In a statement, the couple said they were splitting on the grounds of irreconcilable differences and that a decree nisi is expected next month. Media reports said they had drifted apart and led separate lives, with Robinson spending much of her time in London and New York while Penrose ran his property business in the Cotswolds. Robinson, 63, said: "We have been an enormously important part of each other's lives for a very long time and our friendship will carry on for ever."

Anne Robinson then started shouting "But he ain't getting none of these cookies no more, nuh-uh!" while aggressively slapping her crotch until she got a bit tired and had to sit down.

Although in time we're sure the details of Anne Robinson's divorce will become apparent - we have a feeling it has something to do with Anne Robinson filling her face with Botox so often that she can now only eat by paying an immigrant to manually move her jaw up and down with their hands at mealtimes - it's bound to take a while for Anne Robinson to adjust to being single again. However we're sure that Anne will be able to move on and find plenty more love in her life so long as a) none of her new potential boyfriends stare directly into the ice-cold hellpits of her eyes or b) Anne Robinson forgets how old she is, starts dressing in an uncomfortably unsuitable way and embarrassingly dates a string of men young enough to be her grandchildren. The world's already got one Lulu, you see.

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Weakest Link Star Says Goodbye! To Her Marriage - Reuters