Anna Nicole Smith: Illegal Alien?

Anna Nicole Smith has the worst luck in the world. First off, she marries the love of her life only to have him die shortly thereafter because he was 903 years her senior, and was only alive due do scientific wires and gadgetry.  

Then her son-in-law - whom she'd raised from age 47 or something - died just before a court house family reunion. Then, of course, she suffered the very real tragedy of her losing her young son in a very untimely manner. More recently she's been evicted from her Bahamian bungalow. When it rains it pours.

But for Anna Nicole Smith the rain is more of a monsoon, because now the Bahamian government is considering ripping Smith's legal status in the country out from under her.

The Bahamas and Anna Nicole Smith are not a good mix. Sure, the island Gods were gracious enough to let Smith poop out a baby and what not, but they asked a heavy price - as we're all too aware.

More recently some guy said he owned the house Anna Nicole Smith was staying in, and she was supposed to pay him for it. Smith claimed it was a gift from the guy, but he strongly disagrees.

Local government launched an investigation into the housing fiasco, and as far as we can tell it hasn't been resolved yet. If it ends up that Anna Nicole Smith's accuser is telling the truth, the former fatty is up the river. Her entire permanent resident status in that country hinges on her owning that home. When she applied for her legal status, her lawyers checked the 'home owners' box. Immigration director Vernon Burrows said of the matter:

"Of course the only thing that would have qualified her for permanent residence was the home, so if that's no longer the case then of course we would probably ask her to show cause why it should not be revoked."

If Anna Nicole Smith's permanent resident application documents were falsified, as far as living in the Bahamas goes - she'd be screwed. And getting screwed would risk another pregnancy, then she'd have to give birth in Guam, American Samoa, or in the plant pot currently floating in hecklerspray's lion-pawed bathtub.  

Anna, you can stay as long as you need. Just don't touch our food.

Read more:

Bahamian officials launch probe of Anna Nicole Smith's residency - International Herald Tribune

[story by Shawn Lindseth]