The rumours were correct – Anna Nicole Smith is definitely pregnant again. We thought we'd tell you, because sometimes its hard to tell with all the weight Anna puts on and loses all the time.
Anna Nicole Smith – the classy lady – get the cat out of the bag during a monumentally vague video of her floating on a lilo in a pool on her website. So that's another mouth to feed – those potential billions of dead man's oil dollars will have to be eeked out a little further.
You could say that Anna Nicole Smith hasn't had the best life – for everything she gained, something was taken away. She gained the lucrative Guess Jeans modelling contract in her youth, then made a series of spirit-crushing growler flicks. She found the love of her life in dusty, almost-dead oil billionaire J. Howard Marshall, only to be accused of being a phenomenal gold-digger by his family and took her to the supreme court. She made a name for herself as the kooky star of The Anna Nicole Smith Show, but that name tended to be 'That freakish top-heavy arsehole'.
And this pattern has continued for Anna Nicole Smith; she had a bunch of sexy fun with a mystery man – possibly a member of the paparazzi – only to end up with a uterus full of a whole lot of baby. At first, Anna Nicole Smith's pregnancy was nothing more than a giant cack-handed rumour, but now – finally – Anna Nicole Smith has officially admitted that some guy knocked her up. And she's done it in an effortlessly classy way.
On a video on her official website is a video of Anna Nicole Smith floating on a lilo in her pool. Seemingly bewildered by this weird plastic face she's been told to talk into, Anna Nicole Smith bumbles and slurs her way through her absent-minded confirmation. This is what we think she says, with all the long "uhhhhhhhh" noises snipped out for your reading ease:
"Let me stop all the rumours. Yes, I am pregnant. I'm happy, I'm very, very happy about it. Everything's going really really good. I'll let you see me as I'm growing."
Well, it was either "I'll let you see me as I'm growing," or "I'll let you see my growler." Either way – urgh!
[story by Stuart Heritage]