If you ask us, Angelina Jolie’s heart really isn’t in the whole movie promotion business any more.

Remember the old days? When Angelina Jolie would mark the opening of each new movie by adopting a child from a far-flung country and legally changing its name to Xanax or whatever? Or when she’d promote her films by calling Jennifer Aniston a massive helmet? Well readers, we’re sorry to say that those days are long gone.

Angelina Jolie has a film coming out in less than a fortnight. And how has she chosen to promote it? By getting a tattoo on her inner thigh that nobody but Brad Pitt can see. Big deal. It’s thought that other promotional tactics she considered included drawing a picture of a unicorn on some toilet paper and silently thinking about what a goat would look like if you made it wear a top hat.

There’s nothing quite as soul-destroying as the news that Angelina Jolie has got a film out, is there? For one, it’s a guarantee that the film won’t be anywhere near as good as you expect it to be. And then there’s all the godawful promotion to endure. It’s usually as tedious as it is endless and, because there isn’t a single person on the planet who’s actually looking forward to seeing Angelina Jolie’s new film, this round promises to be even more tedious and endless than ever.

So what’s it going to be this time, Angelina? A pregnancy? An adoption? More holier-than-thou preaching about landmines and poverty? Another off-puttingly synthetic war or words with Jennifer Aniston? No, sadly it’s nothing as exciting as that. We’ll let Digital Spy do the explaining:

Angelina Jolie has revealed that she has a new tattoo on her inner thigh, which she got for Brad Pitt. In an interview with MTV News, the Salt star however refused to say what the new ink mark could be. She said: “Um, it’s for Brad. It is something for Brad.”

What? That’s it? A tattoo? Angelina Jolie is promoting a film by getting a tattoo that nobody apart from her rat-bearded boyfriend will ever get to see? That’s mildly underwhelming. But still, at least it means we can play Guess What Angelina Jolie Has Had Tattooed On Her Inner Thigh For Brad Pitt. Our guesses:

* A picture of Jennifer Aniston’s face.

* An arrow pointing towards her vagina, accompanied by the phrase ‘Hey Brad, remember when you used to find this interesting?’

* A dot-to-dot picture of a reindeer playing tennis.

* Some pointless old shit, probably written in a language she can’t understand, that she wrongly believes makes her look cleverer and more profound than she actually is.

Yeah, we’re going for the last one too.

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