Everyone has their own little personal fears, be it heights, spiders or – in our case – young girls with the faces of old ladies who stand at the foot of your bed watching you while you sleep.
Not even fatmouthed do-gooder moviestars like Angelina Jolie are exempt from these irrational fears. In Angelina's case, however, the thing that scares her the most is her lying on a table, surrounded by begowned men who proceed to slash open her belly and pull out a screaming pink animal covered in blood that's somehow joined to her guts by a kind of fleshy cord. That's what Angelina Jolie told CNN, anyway, so who are we to disagree?
In years to come, the story of Angelina Jolie giving birth to Shiloh Nouvel will be warped and warped until everybody thinks that Angelina Jolie was still a virgin when she fell pregnant, and that the paparazzi knew where she was giving birth by following a shining star in the sky, and the wise men of People and Hello magazine approached her with gifts of expensive picture deals .
But, for now, we all know that wasn't the case. In real life, the act of giving birth is – for want of a better expression – really bloody disgusting. A screaming, red-faced woman trying to force a screaming, blood-covered person out of her genitalia – that's what it is. Either that or a doctor tearing a gash open along her belly, sticking his arm into her guts up to his shoulder and yanking a baby out, which is what happened to Angelina Jolie. And, as she told CNN's Anderson Cooper, she was as terrified by the birth as we are slightly grossed-out:
"You know, because you're there for the birth, which I wasn't for my first two kids, you're just suddenly terrified that they're not gonna take a first breath. That was my whole focus. I just wanted to hear her cry."
What's the rush, Angelina? There's plenty of time for that in the future when Shiloh Nouvel starts to comprehend what a ridiculous name she's been given. Also in the interview, although there seems to be a disappointing lack of baby-documentary talk, Angelina Jolie revealed that Brad Pitt was there alongside her during the birth, being all supportive and probably taking notes on all the screaming and guts for his new zombie movie.
[story by Stuart Heritage]