Hello kids, Stu here. Thanks to a disastrously-advised drunken conversation I had with a one-legged stranger in a pub by the docks at lunchtime, I’m afraid I’ll be leaving you for the best part of a month, starting from right now.
It’s my own fault really, but you know how it is – a pirate slips something into your drink while you’re busy discussing Rebecca Romijn‘s pregnancy and the next thing you know you’ve been clubbed on the head, thrown into a row-boat and forced to enter the world of late-night Channel Four comedy at cutlass-point. May God help my very soul.
I’ll have somehow managed to unchain myself from this pirate radiator by the last week of August, at which normal service will resume, but until then I’ll leave hecklerspray in the disgustingly capable hands of Ian Dransfield. Be nice to him, it was his birthday this week.
{ 13 comments… read them below or add one }
First a vacation, now this…:)
I know. What an arsehole.
But is Ian fat? We hate fat editors!
Taking a cruise on the Scientology Sea Org?
We do indeed hate fat editors and to answer your question, yes, yes he is.
Make me editor pro tempore.
gir, El Grande Editor Locum Tenens
So, what happened to his other leg?
i dont care!
Damnit! Damnit! Damnit!
Ian isn’t funny! Shit. Guess i’ll go get a tan before the summer is officially over….
Hey Stu!! Guess you really were running away! From me, and anybody else who would cream you with a thrashing…Scared? Can you be scared? Of my creamy thrashing? I think so…
Off to TV land, eh?
Soon he’ll be a celebrity.
Next we’ll be reading about Stu getting popped for drinks driving and having an accident whilst tongue kissing Amy Winehouse.
Then impregnating Miley Cyrus.
I think Jim is gay. Not because he sucks (literally), but because the “cream you with a thrashing” threat and the bit about a “creamy thrashing” is a little, well, homosexual.