There’s nothing more heartwarming than when actresses who we forgot even existed get engaged to anonymous men, is there?

That’s why we’re so over the moon for Alyssa Milano. According to reports, Alyssa Milano has got engaged to David Bugliari, a man who – as proved by at least one piece of photographic evidence – sometimes wears a tie and stuff.

Actually David Bugliari is an agent at the Creative Arts Agency, so hopefully his engagement to Alyssa Milano will spark off a career renaissance that takes Alyssa back to her glory years. That’s right: we’re talking Poison Ivy II: II here.

We’ve always thought that the one thing Alyssa Milano needed was a bloody good agent. There’s literally no end to Alyssa’s talents, and good representation would give her the career boost she so desperately needs.

Actually, we should clear that last sentence up a bit. What we meant was there’s no end to Alyssa Milano’s talents provided you can’t count further than ’starring in even-worse sequels to bad erotic thrillers’, ‘doing minor voiceover work in the long-forgotten direct-to-video sequel to Lady And The Tramp‘, ’starring in a TV show about witches that continued to be made for five full years after everyone stopped watching it’, ‘embarking on a wildly unsuccessful Japan-only singing career’ and something called ‘Alyssa Milano’s Teen Steam Workout Video‘. But we’re straying off target.

What we’re trying to say is that Alyssa Milano’s prayers have been answered because she’s just got engaged to David Bulgiari, a man who just happens to be an agent. And that’s just the tip of the iceberg as far as Alyssa Milano-related engagement facts go, as People reports:

Milano, 36, will marry David Bugliari, an agent at the Creative Arts Agency. The couple have been dating for more than a year. Bugliari proposed with a ring he designed that was made by Jim Lavi at Daniel Jewelry in La Jolla.  No further information about their nuptials – including a wedding date – has been announced.

OK, look, we didn’t say it was a very big iceberg. But anyway, here’s hoping that Alyssa Milano finds happiness with David Bulgiari, and that this marriage is more successful than her last, which ended in 1999. It’s not known if David Bulgiari has ever been married before, but that’s because he’s so startlingly anonymous that we doubt even members of his own family could select him from a line-up, even if the other members of that line-up consisted of nothing but wild animals and potted plants.

Incidentally, it’s being reported that Alyssa Milano got engaged to David Bulgiari on December 18. Nobody seems to know why it took three whole weeks for this news to leak out, but it isn’t because nobody cares about Alyssa Milano any more. Oh, no, wait – it is because of that. Our mistake.

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