Think that A Quantum Of Solace is a crappy name for a James Bond title? Perhaps it'll make more sense when it's bellowed by a 67-year-old shouting midget with no real sense of subtlety.
You guessed it – Al Pacino is going to star in the new James Bond movie A Quantum Of Solace.
Thank God for that – after spending weeks fretting over the quality of the new James Bond film, it looks like all our fears were misplaced. Now that Al Pacino has signed up for a role in A Quantum Of Solace, we're confident that it'll be at least as good as Ocean's Thirteen. Phew, right?
New James Bond movie A Quantum Of Solace isn't even released until November, and already everyone's frothing themselves into a tizzy about it. Daniel Craig may have proved himself in the not quite as good as everyone says it is Casino Royale, but that's not to say there aren't plenty of other things to worry about.
Like the director. Marc Forster might be good at directing hushed little films about sad Afghans, but films about a smooth-talking wanker shooting 32 foreigners in the head and then zinging out an off-the-cuff quip about female genitalia? We'll have to wait and see. The main concern, though, seems to be that Bond 22 is called A Quantum Of Solace – not so much a title as an apology. An apology about dishwasher tablets, from what we can work out.
Or at least that was the main concern about A Quantum Of Solace. The new main concern with A Quantum Of Solace is that fucking Al Pacino's going to be in it.
It's true, Al Pacino is going to be in A Quantum Of Solace. The Mirror said so:
After top secret negotiations in LA, the screen legend is set to play the head of the international terrorist group introduced in Casino Royale. A Bond insider revealed last night: "It's not a major role but it's an extremely important one. It will be a brief on-screen appearance. "Everyone is really excited at the prospect of having such a huge star joining the cast. It will be fabulous to see him square up against Bond."
Yes, we can't wait either. Imagine that – the star of Gigli, Two For The Money and Ocean's Thirteen lending some star power to the 007 franchise. Well, when we say 'lending some star power' we actually mean 'strolling on five minutes from the end and shouting all his lines like he's trying to explain a complicated abstract concept to a clueless deaf pensioner.' Which is kind of the same thing.
Anyway, we don't want to judge Al Pacino's role in A Quantum Of Solace yet because we haven't seen it. Plus it's just a cameo, like when Madonna turned up in the middle of that Die Another Day fencing scene.
And that was just super, wasn't it?
Read more:
Al Pacino to make a guest appearance in the next Bond movie – Mirror
mst3kster says
I can just imagine Al Pacino pulling downs his pants, then while holding his wee-wee in one hand, exclaiming to 007: “Say hello to my little friend!”