Michael Jackson is dead. That’s too bad because he probably had a decent record left in him once he realised he oughta work with some decent songwriters and producers. Still, his memory lives on in his music, his batshit mental fans, court trials and of course, loads of things and people that look loads like him.
Have you ever found yourself drawing a little mouth on a slice of mushroom and thinking that it looks like the King of Pop? Just me singing in a terrible falsetto about world poverty then?
Well, here’s a list of things that look like Michael Jackson – MJ fans, stoke your ire and get ready to ask us what we’ve ever contributed to the world and the like.
Here we go. Here’s a list to disagree with.
Jack White
Look! Jack White looks a bit like Michael Jackson! Long black hair… blank, expressionless face. Yep. There’s some MJ in him alright.
Big, bulging eyes. Long neck. Magical red ended thing to touch children with whilst hiding in a closet from angry parents and government officials, can’t handle his ale…
A Cloud
This cloud was over New York City a while back and if you squint, it looks a bit like Michael Jackson. Or an unhappy clown. Okay, we admit it… this is rubbish. That won’t stop Michael Jackson fans saying “I always knew there was something special about him! He watching over us! WE LOVE YOU MICHAEL!”
Latoya Jackson
Michael Jackson in drag.
Edward Scissorhands
Mop of unhealthy hair and a hacked at face. It’s MJ! Hell, he’s even wearing the suit from the Bad video!
Ari from Planet of the Apes
The nose, the hair and the shit clothes. It’s all there.
A camp skeleton with sunken eyes and bleached out face? IT’S MICHAEL JACKSON!
An unborn foetus
Imagine the horror of seeing Michael Jackson’s face emerging from the ultrasound picture as you carry a child in your womb! On the left of this picture is quite clearly Michael Jackson. Make your own puns about him going for increasingly younger kids.
An Egyptian Mummy Thing!
Look. That’s him. That’s actually him. Eddie Murphy is going to appear in a minute, just before this mask sings ‘Do You Remember The Time’.
Nope. This terrifying shit looks nothing like Michael Jackson yet still charges money for precisely that reason.
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KLK says
You are such an asshole!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
natalie says
Go screw yourselfs, you rude inbreeds. Can’t you go a day without disrespecting Michael, seriously?
jam says
Goodness me, even when the guy’s dead…
I’m not his biggest fan, but seriously, this is pretty low. The person who wrote this is obviously an infant.
Leah says
I notice the writer does nothing but write crap about celebrities. It must be hard not being bitter about people who are more successful than him. Maybe if “Mof” had some sort of talent as a writer, he would have a proper job as a journalist.
But no, he sits on his inevitably fat behind eating yet more Twinkies and chugging his 30% extra free cheap version of Coca-Cola, wishing that he too was on Big Brother and was screwing the women who wouldn’t look twice at him of whom he writes masturbatory, “needs-a-map-to-locate- a-clit” opinons/”news” stories.
Truth! says
-You can’t defame the dead. Just as well, as doing it when they are alive could be a costly mistake. Anyway, come on…. The guy was a dysfuncyional freak all along. Claims to be ‘innocent’ like a child! (Not many children managed to retain their innocence after coming into contact with him – Irony) How many multi millionarre international pop stars can seriously claim to be naive?! Ones that live in a retarded delusion, that’s who… The same one as their mental fans. “I’m so naive and innocent I married Elvis’ Daughter. Oh, and then paid out millions of dollars to people accusing me of things I’m wealthy enough to defend myself againt, at all costs, to clear my good name. Yes, I’m one of the richest men in the world with the best lawyers, and I didn’t bother go to law court, no they advised me to just pay”…. *Yawn*
Jennie says
LOL. You know what? Guys that Gossip a lot: Faggotry to a third degree. You don’t have a girlfriend don’t you? yeah yeah I’m pretty sure you love wanking with Michael Jackson’s goldpants video. Enjoy :
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qCfm9RCM09A
Captain Howdy says
*YAWN* Gossip for grown ups my ass. You guys should be shot for posting such shit. Get some ass–no wait, you can’t. That’s why you’re on here wasting everyone’s time.